Blah!

Monday! Don't get mad, but I don't want to do the blog challenge today. The challenge for today is something about how I feel about my reflection in the mirror and I'm just not feeling that today. Now, don't get me wrong... I love myself. Just lately, I've been feeling very BLAH and I don't want to lie in my blog or be negative about myself... lose, lose! So, instead I'm just not going to talk about it. I could have just skipped it I guess and went on to the next one but... blah! IDK.
But anywhoozle. Seeing as how I'm not feeling 100% about myself, I need to find my way out of this rut. I'm used to feeling much better about myself, I no likey this. For starters, I'm back into those gray running shoes. One, this added weight is not a good look for me. I miss my 2010 body... 2011, although I'm feeling good, I'm not paying enough attention to myself and what my body is doing. That J guy had me distracted... feeding me good, making me happy and stuff! What's his problem? But all the good eating put alot of good weight on, and... its gots to go! ASAP! So the running shoes have been on (only 2 days straight so far) faithfully, but I plan to stay motivated and get it (keep it) together. Now, Idk if you've been paying attention or not but this isn't the first time I've said this. There have been a number of "I'm gonna get it together" claims... then I would fall off either from lack of time, motivation, or (more importantly) I'd be having a stretch of good hair days (that wouldn't be conducive to working out)! Which brings me to my 2nd less than 100% issue... this hair is driving me crazy! I just want to chop it ALL off! Idk if this is just me but I think most women can agree... if you don't feel good about your hair, your whole day seems to suck! Or if you're not feeling good about the way you look, nothing else seems to go right. Maybe its all in our head, but its real! I am having a hair #fail lately and I really need to figure something out soon. I'm about to just be like forget my hair, so what if it looks crazy, I'm going to work out and get skinny and worry about my hair later. Then again this skinny thing isn't going to happen instantaneously so i feel I at least should have awesome hair... what to do? what to do? Fit body and crazy hair or awesome hair and fat? LOL, I should not have to choose! I can either invest in a gym membership or a good hairdresser, which do I choose? Am I the only one with this issue... DAMN this natural hair? I'm trying to do the right thing by my hair but it isn't cooperating with me. Of course, the rest of my life falls into place and now I cant get my hair and body together. Cant I have it all? Is that too much to ask? I am going to work on having all these things work out at the same time... you guys just wait. One day I am going to have a happy relationship, a fit body and awesome hair all at the same time... even if its just one days worth? When that one day happens, I'm going to take a picture to remember it just in case it doesn't carry over to the next day. On an off day (when I'm barely keeping it together and cant keep all 3 of these things in check), which should I let suffer? I should ask the J guy would he mind taking the slack so I can be hot! "Babe, my hair is important and being thin and healthy is essential. Can you just allow me this one day to be an ass? I appreciate you (even if under these trying times it doesn't seem like I do)! You got me? Thanks babe!" You guys think that'll work? Maybe its not a good idea...  I'll focus on my weight and my relationship and let my hair go wild!
You'd think what else could be having Tam feeling like crappola? She's so sweet and pleasant and has a lovely smile... (I know that's exactly what you were thinking). Well this lovely smile of mine is failing me... I have all kinds of problems going on right now with my teeth and I don't like that at all. I think if I were fat and had crazy hair, I'd still be up and feeling good .. but this teeth thing is really taking a toll on me and knocking me out! I (used to) love my smile, always bright and white... :( now, its doing its own thing and... I don't even want to talk about it! I just feel defeated, and disappointed in my choice of 2 (sucky) dentist. I feel like they both contributed to making it worse instead of better and there's not much I can do about it. If you've ever had mouth problems, then you'd understand (maybe). But I was a faithful brusher, not a big candy eater, I flossed... Idk where I messed up and Idk what to do. My face is still numb from a root canal almost 2 years ago... imagine that! I'm done, I can't and I don't want to! Yes, I'm highly emotional over it and I don't want to talk about it (not even in this blog bubble)!!!!

Well... it seems in trying to get around discussing my "reflection in the mirror", I did just that! I'm such a dork sometimes... I hope overall it was more proactive than depressing. I love Tam but I need to get Tam's reflection in the mirror to a better place. I'll keep you updated on the deets of them all, but you can bet your mama I'm on the treadmill once I get home! (the kids may have to wait for dinner, but...whatever!)

Enjoy what's left of your Monday... that's my peace!